Why write a book entitled, Things That Might Annoy . . . A Jets Fan? Why would anyone feel the need to annoy a group of folks who haven’t won anything in 40-plus years? Well, that’s kind of the point.
Despite the fact that the Jets haven’t had a championship since The Supremes were rocking the charts with “Love Child”, their fans somehow feel justified in acting like they are a dynasty. They, therefore, need to be constantly informed of their irrelevance. Heck, they are second-class citizens in their own city. Diana Ross needs to come up with a remake for those green clad doofuses called, “Step Child”.
And we needed to write a book called, Things That Might Annoy . . . A Jets Fan. It includes hundreds of things to say and do to protect yourself from the obnoxiousness that is a Jets fan. In addition to being an essential self-defense guide, the book also provides some heartfelt suggestions for Jets fans in our chapters: “Mascots For The Mascot-Less Jets” and “Substantially Better And More Creative Chants Than J-E-T-S JETS-JETS-JETS”.
We assure you that this book has been produced by people who have felt the annoyance of Jets fans. There are not many football teams that have a less prestigious history than the Jets. But Dave’s favorite team, the Bills, probably falls into that category. Growing up, his only reply to the taunts he received from Jets fans was one word: “Simpson!” No, not O.J.; Bill Simpson. What? You don’t remember his interception as the Jets were driving for a winning touchdown against the Bills in a 1980 playoff game? Well, don’t worry about it. Jets fan do.
Paul grew up in New England and he has unquestionably experienced the illogical euphoria of Jets fans after their team has squeaked out wins over the Patriots. He would very much like Jets fans to know that the time to act like you have just won a Super Bowl is after your team has actually won a Super Bowl. Paul would also very much like Jets fans to, well, suffer immense pain. If by chance your hatred for Jets fans is on the same level, then the last few chapters are for you. As one with a law degree though, Dave feels compelled to make it perfectly clear that all of those chapters contain jokes that are to be read, not implemented. And as a normal human being, Paul feels compelled to retort with, “Duh.”
So, whether you are a fan of the Patriots, Bills, Dolphins, Giants or just a rational soul who realizes that Jets fans are annoying, this book is a must for you. It will also make the perfect gift not only for any Jets hater that you know, but also for any Jets fan. Truly, what better way to annoy a Jets fan than to give him a book entitled, Things That Might Annoy. . . A Jets Fan. As our motto states, “It’s Payback Time . . . And Payback’s A Book.”
Take it easy,
Paul and Dave